Check-up

Thursday 28 September 2017

Earlier this week I had an appointment with The Professor.

It felt like a long time since the last appointment, and it was: almost six months.  A lot has happened in that period but I suspect check-ups every six months or so will become the norm from now on.

The Professor was half an hour late and seemingly in a hurry to make up time.  He rattled through the routine checks on my movement and I told me I was doing well on my medication.  He was amused about my Candy Crush addiction, though thankfully, having reached level 1,000 (which starts with a cool "M" formation of green candies in case you're interested) I am finally bored of it and have largely stopped play.

On the more important question of my possible heart failure, he agreed the symptoms were most likely due to the pramipexole but he was not overly concerned. He told me he had come across cases of tightness in the chest which had settled down. So we agreed that I should continue with my current dosage and drop down a level if it didn't improve within a week or two. Nevertheless he recommended following through with ECGs and so on just in case.

Although he came across as almost dismissive, I found it comforting to hear from the professional. If he's not worried then I feel I have no need to worry either.

I reminded him about my genetic quest and he confirmed that the initial testing he had done corroborated the negative result on the LRRK2 gene. He said he would follow up with further tests on other genes using the blood sample that I had already provided, and let me know the results. So I may not need to fork out for private genetic testing after all.

Finally we talked a little about the future. Fatigue aside, I should still have many active years ahead and he talked about me potentially participating in clinical trials in a year or two.  Once again, he painted a bright picture of many drugs under development, as well as more invasive treatments like stem cell therapy, that are likely to result in a breakthrough in a timeframe that is meaningful to me.

Let's hope he's right. The clock is ticking - for both my mother and me - and I imagine the next six months will fly by in no time at all.


Heart failure

Sunday 24 September 2017

After the gloominess of my last two posts, perhaps brought on by the autumnal weather, I was in the mood to write something positive.

Despite the ups and downs of everyday life, I was starting to feel like I was winning.  Take control of Parkinson's, don't let Parkinson's control you, so I have heard people say on some of the online forums.

So it is annoying that I have started to develop symptoms over the last 2-3 weeks that are consistent with heart failure.

First the good news: heart failure is not the same as a heart attack. A heart attack is when you have pain in your chest, your heart can stop working and you can die.

Heart failure is when your heart has weakened and has to work harder to do its job.  Some of the symptoms which I have felt coming on gradually over recent weeks are a tightness in the chest, shortness of breath (especially when exercising), fatigue and palpitations.  I had my first significant palpitation when I was sitting in a meeting: a very rapid pulsation on the top right of my chest that lasted a minute or two. I could feel it with my hand. PFS at the time, though I am learning to take these things in my stride now.

I did some research and discovered cardiac failure is a rare side effect of my dopamine agonist, pramipexole.  Medical opinion is not conclusive on the subject but there seems to be growing evidence of a link, and it seems that the symptoms subside when the medication is stopped.

I went to see a GP at my local surgery this week and, although she referred me for a blood test and an ECG, I think she was of the same view that this was most likely due to my Parkinson's medication.  The simple reason is that nine months ago I had comprehensive set of cardiac tests that showed essentially nothing, and the only thing that has changed in the last 6 weeks is that I upped my dose of pramipexole by 50%.

By coincidence I am due to see The Professor tomorrow so I will discuss all of this with him along with my genetic testing results. I guess there are two possible outcomes:

(a) I stop the medication and move onto something else;
(b) I keep going, keep a close eye on things, and hope that the symptoms subside.

As I write I can feel a tightness on the top left of my chest and a slight gurgling of something inside. Relatively minor, and I remain upbeat.

But enough to remind me that, right now, my Parkinson's is definitely controlling me.

A typical day

Monday 11 September 2017

I am dreaming vividly - something involving snakes at a funfair - and I wake up feeling alert.

It is dark outside and I lean over to look at the alarm clock.  I am disappointed to discover that it is still only 12:30 am so I have slept for a little under three hours.

Fortunately I get back to sleep quickly and next wake up at around 3 am. After that, getting back to sleep gets progressively harder and I doze in stretches of around 30 minutes until it is 6 am. 

I get up, shower and prepare for the day whilst Clara sleeps.

Before 7, I pop my little white pill, feed the cat, make tea and have some breakfast - two slices of toast and some fruit.  The fruit is important.  My 1.57mg of pramipexole will release slowly throughout the day but it is not perfect and the chemicals in my brain will ebb and flow.

By now Clara is in the bathroom getting ready for work, so I shout goodbye as I leave for the station on a crisp autumnal morning.

I arrive at the station to find my train has been cancelled, so I jam onto a different train and prepare for a longer journey.  I can still stand reasonably comfortably on a crowded commuter train but I ponder what it may be like in a few years' time - will I need to wear one of those attention-seeking "please give me a seat" badges?   

By the time I arrive in the office just after 8, I have dealt with most of the emails in my inbox and I exchange pleasantries for five minutes with a few colleagues.   

But I keep the chit-chat to a minimum as I need to prepare for a 9 am meeting I am leading about an industry event we are organising. After that I am in back-to-back meetings relating to various projects until about 1 pm, after which I pay a quick visit to the canteen.  Throughout the morning I am alert and productive as my dopamine agonist kicks in.

I eat my veggie soup and sandwich at my desk - probably my neighbours are distracted by the smell, but I am oblivious to any odours.

The afternoon has fewer meetings but I am busy chatting to people on various topics, emailing clients, preparing plans and reacting to instant messages.

At around 4, I am feeling uncomfortable with constipation so I sneak off to the gents and spend 10 or 15 minutes squeezing in a cubicle whilst playing a few games of Candy Crush.  I am moderately successful at both endeavours.

I emerge a little red and sweaty and I keep my head down, hoping that I don't bump into anyone I know... 

I have a brief catch up with my boss and I notice him looking at my right hand which is tremoring slightly.  I hold it close to my body and carry on as if nothing unusual is happening.  I think he is as embarrassed as I am.

By 6, I still have items on my to do list - a document to finish writing and a client proposal to draft, but I am disciplined and prepare to head home and pick these things up in the morning.  My attention span is very short now as I am pretty tired. 

The journey home is uneventful but I notice a bit more mild tremor in the evening chill whilst waiting on the platform.

Clara is home before me, doing something on the PC.  Once she is finished I decide to write this post whilst she prepares dinner.

We eat and catch up on the news of the day.  I allow myself a glass of wine.  Often we talk about any manner of malarkey related to my mother-in-law's Alzheimer's or my own Parkinson's but this evening we talk about some gossip in her office and the neighbours' neglected dogs.

By 9:30 pm, I am spent and ready for bed.

The good news is that I made it through another work day.

The bad news is it's still only Monday.

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